Single mom allows her kids to skip their uncle's celebration of life because their father's new girlfriend will be in attendance: ‘[My son] expresses that he does not want her there’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Aug 17, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

It's important to allow your children to make their own decisions, especially when it involves situations that will leave them emotionally distraught. The mother in this next story allows her children to skip their favorite uncle's celebration of life because their father's new girlfriend will be there, and they have no desire to meet her.

Some kids' decisions should be checked by their parents, like what they want to eat for dinner or throwing out their classmate's favorite toy because they're jealous. However, emotional choices, especially made by capable, sentient children, should not be walked all over. At the end of the day, we need to respect our children's choices and believe them when they tell us they really don't want to do something or meet someone new. The kids in this next story don't want to meet their father's new girlfriend because there was a tumultuous period where their father was seeing both their mother and this new girlfriend. It's messy and complicated, and the mother and her kids want no part in this —this is fair. Their father and his new girl, however, don't agree. Scroll to read the full story.

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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "AITA for not forcing my kids to meet their Dads new girlfriend at their favorite uncle’s celebration of life and letting them skip it?"

    A few years ago, me and my kids dad had separated. Two weeks after announcing a new relationship on Facebook he
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  • called me stating that he would rather go on a camping trip that I have been planning with our boys and try and make things work out
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  • with our family then be poolside with somebody else's family. I agreed and we packed up and took our youngest son camping
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  • that weekend. After what I thought was a really nice day me and him were walking hand-in- hand down the beach Lakeside and we got the devastating Hall that his brother was going to the hospital and was on life-support.
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  • Cheezburger Image 10541733888
    via Amy Humphries for Unsplash

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • At this point, I was under the impression that he had broken up with the girl and that we were reconciling. We spent weeks
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  • going back-and-forth to the hospital only for me to find out that he had still been with this girl each time we returned home and I had gone home to our kids and he had gone back to his house.
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  • I bit my tongue at first 'cause he was losing his brother, but then I snapped. I told her exactly what he'd been doing, picked her up myself, and we confronted him. He acted like I was intruding on their relationship. That was my line I went no-contact.
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  • Fast-forward to after his brother's passing I get a phone call from the girl. mind you not only has this girl not met my children, she's never met his
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  • brother, she decides it's a good idea to inform me that she will be attending my brother-in-law's celebration of life with my kids dad.
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  • She asked to talk to my children and they agree and she has a conversation with my oldest son and he expresses that he does not want her there and her response was that her only job is to be supportive of their dad.
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  • So aita for respecting their wishes to not attend the services?
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  • Pale_Cranberry1502 NTA. Your Ex is the crummiest crum that ever crummed. She isn't great for dating him when she knew you were still trying to see if you could work things out, but that's mainly on him.
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  • If gutless wonder wasn't going to let you know she was going to be there, I do respect her for giving you a heads up that she was going to be there to support him.
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  • It means your kids won't be able to say goodbye to their Uncle, but their argument will be that brother trumps nephews in the grief circle. This played out terribly, but that logic unfortunately isn't wrong. Personally I wouldn't have the nerve to go if I were her, but you can only control what's in your power.
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  • If he's not cremated, bring them to his grave to say goodbye in the near future. Spend the funeral day doing something with them that they liked to do with him.
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  • Crazy4Swayze42 NTA. Your oldest already said he doesn't want her there and doesn't want to go. There is no upside for you to force them to go other than hurting your own relationship with the kids. Respect your kids wishes like you would an adult on this matter.
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  • Shall WeStartThen NTA- wow. They really deserve each other. You're looking out for your kids, which is way more than be said for their father. He's awful, but how on earth can she think it is an appropriate time to force an introduction to his children????
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  • Expert_Set8444 My biggest issue was her asking for their blessing and then when she didnt get it and I quote "why is that my problem"
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  • n_Ismom NTA. Of course not! I'm sure that you know that. Don't shy away from telling his family why you're all not there if they ask.
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  • Expert_Set8444 I didnt shy away from it and sadly this story ended with me raising the kids alone because he slowly pushed them out every time they brought up his or her behavior
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  • wayward painter NTA but your kids take the lead here. It's their uncle and you're their mom. So if your kids want you, you go. If no, then no. If they don't want to go. You can have a special uncle time hangout to remember him. Re-dad and the gf, you need the co-parenting app. You need to talk with your ex, and not have whoever he is with be the point person.
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  • Expert_Set8444 This is a boss of a response and I live that it is all about the kids and it implements a safety protocol as well.
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family dynamics family drama entitled parents entitlement reddit story family feud parenting entitled family reddit thread parent Reddit Parenting Fail parents entitled people Parenting FAILS
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